Is Confession Good for the Soul?

Yes and no. Yes, if you are talking to someone you love, trust, and can afford to be vulnerable with, confessing a way that you have wronged them can deepen intimacy and help set you free. No, if you are confessing to a person who is not going to offer you grace, vault your story, or be kind.

I grew up hearing confession is good for the soul. My mother would say that whenever someone fessed up to having done something wrong in the house.

I remember thinking, I ain't confessin' nothin'. I didn't want people to know the downsides to my character. I always opted for a lie to get out of trouble. Facing consequences was not my strong suit.

Today I read something in the book of James that knocked my socks off and helped me understand why my life is so much better now that I choose honesty nine times out of ten. (It’s a work in progress ;-)

Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power." James 5:16

Confess, pray, and be healed.

I am not advocating for you to go to a priest (though some find healing in that). The thing I love most about my spirituality is that it is between me and God. I can tell Him things and He always keeps my secrets. He is my safe space to fall.

Another way to release guilt is to share difficult thoughts and emotions with a trained, trusted professional. Often, when we share something that has lived only in our heads and we are able to hear it come out of our mouths, we get the ability to think about it differently. As well, when we are able to receive a different perspective on it, we are able to explore it from a more patient and kind headspace. There are healing properties in someone making non-judgmental room for you to process things.

Sometimes when you are in a relationship with someone, they’re the only person you need to share with. it deepens intimacy to share your joys and your shortcomings, to say I am sorry when you have done them wrong, to let your friend or partner wipe a tear when you cry.

There are healing properties in knowing that even when you stumble, there is one who will keep walking with you, someone who will continue to love you even when you aren’t at your best. Whether that is God, your partner, your mother, or your sister friend, it’s healing to know you’re loved despite your out-of-character moments.

Space for your wonderings can be a healing salve when generously applied. Love can be like a soothing balm, flowing over your wounds, healing you… if you let it. In order to access that kind of love, we’ve got to be courageous enough to share something difficult, risking rejection, but hoping for acceptance from those we love.

I think my mother was right. Confession is good for the soul.